Saturday, February 19, 2011

BLAST to the PAST

Oh blast. I should probably be using my time wisely while everyone and their dog went home for the 3 day weekend by writing my Huck Finn essay. But alas, I’m not. I’ll blog instead. Now this is going to be far more interesting and entertaining to me than to you. So for all of you who have been bugging me to update my blog, I’ll do another one soon. :)
I love pictures. Like a lot. I can sit and look at old pictures for hours, and that is not an exaggeration. I love pictures and the memories that come with it… Probably because I’ve had the coolest life ever and have had many a good and awkward times that are hilarious to look back on.
But anyway, I was looking at old pictures yesterday and it got me thinking… you know how everyone has “the awkward stage”? Well, mine was ridiculously long. It was strongest from 8th grade to the end of my sophomore year. But let’s be honest… it even went past that… like to my first year of college. Haha, I’m awkward.
But these are my thoughts on this:
In 8th grade there were lots and lots of changes in mine and my families’ lives. Things were changing left and right it seemed every day and there was a lot to get used to. Plus, I was 13.. That’s just an awkward time of life for everyone, especially girls. Looking back, I kinda distanced myself from everyone. So not smart, but I did it. I had my friends that I had since elementary school but they were all changing and meeting new people and they were just my “school friends.” I never wanted to do anything on the weekends. The weekends I was home I felt like I was free, so I just wanted to stay home. The weekends I was at my dad’s we usually did some type of activity, and for some reason I didn’t think I could do things with my friends, I don’t know why I thought that. But I did. Yet the world kept spinning…
In 9th grade it was pretty much the same. I was still getting used to all the changes that happened the past year. I don’t have too many memories from 8th or 9th grade. I was just going through the motions of life. I became extremely shy and never talked to anyone. Luckily, I was blessed with an exceptionally great attitude. It’s almost harder for me to be miserable than to be happy.. It’s nothing I do, it just happens. So I never really felt sad, down, or anything really.. I was kinda emotionless. I’m emotion retarded. I liked going to school and had many a fun times with the people there.
I pretty much only had one real friend up to this point. Kymber Renee is her name... I can't thank her enough. I don't know what I would have done without her. I love her guts still to this day! I say she was my own real friend because.. well I don't really know what I mean. Ya... I don't know... Even though I didn't really talk about my life with her, she was still there for me, just to be a friend. I knew other people and we were friends when we were together, but we didn't try to get together. Does that make sense? I guess I don't know what i'm trying to say..
My sophomore year I became closer to Zoe and Mia - These 2 girls saved my life. We spent a lot of time together and I realized how fun it was to be with people again. I could be myself when I was with them and I loved it. We had other friends too, but I was definitely closest to these two. I don’t even know how I got to be so lucky to find them when I did. Even though I was starting to find myself, I was still awkward. Also this year I had the greatest seminary teacher ever, Brother Goodman. He was so good at bringing in the spirit into my life every day. I felt so many prompting from the spirit and started to have a better relationship with my Heavenly Father. This helped more than anything, especially with my stupid knee injury this year.
Oh, and besides the fact that I was emotionally and socially retarded for so long… my hair was also ALWAYS plastered to my head from 8th to 10th grade. I know. DISGUSTING. Haha, but it happened. And I only wore makeup when I felt like it… which was not very often.
My junior year was the best year of my life up to that point. I LOVED it. I met many more people and we had a great group of friends. Rachel Hicks and Jake Paterson were my heroes this year. I loved being with them and my true self came out a lot more than it had in a long time. We could have a good time no matter what we were doing. They all influenced my life quite a lot and were great examples to me… Now many of them our on missions, how sweet. Plus, I became a lot closer to Matthew. It was the year after he graduated before his mission and he honestly became one of my best friends.
My senior year was fun as well. It was like a continuation of junior year... only way different. Our group of friends that we would hang out with every weekend changed. But it was all still good. I loved my life and the people in it. Even though this year wasn’t as good as junior year I did NOT want to graduate.. haha don’t know why, college is SO much better. My junior and senior year I was at school and work from 6:45 to 5:00 everyday. Then I would come home and do homework and go to bed. I was out with my friends every Friday and Saturday night… so, unfortunately, I still wasn’t very close to my family.
Then I came to college. I would say more… but this is already extremely long and I’ve talked about it before. So I’ll just quickly say… it’s been the best 2 years of my life. I've grown SO SO much. I love it. I love everyone I have met. I love learning from people. I learn from everyone. I love my family more than anything. I have the greatest friends ever. People amaze me.
I came here to get away from my awkard past - just for a little bit, so I could find myself. I'M FOUND! I'm still quiet sometimes... i'm still too loud sometimes. But that's just me. I'll probably always be a little awkward.(Just jopefully not as much as from 8-10 grade... you be the judge:) ) But you'll just have to get used to it! I'm me!
Hahaha. My life is just plain awesome!! :)
Now, if only Huck Finn was as fun and entertaining to write about as my own life… :)